things I learned in Paris

  • Paris is the most expensive city in the world
  • Coffee can be as cheap as half price if you drink at the counter (comptoir)
  • You’re really just advertising yourself as a total dick if you don’t at least try to speak some French
  • The projectionist at the cinemateque sometimes chooses to show the reels in random order (100% of the time in my case)
  • Drink wine, not beer
  • Parisian winos fake orgasms for money
  • Paris is cold!
  • You too can join the alien invasion
  • Riots?